Ask Savage

[Savage]

Yeah, and have mucho champagny or tequila or some such, and learn not to incinerate bacon, fuckwad. Because a breakfast without pig fat and loose chicken embryos is like a day without that fucking ugly yellow thing that burns and hurts/

which actually would be a good thing, so forget I said it, okay? I like my atmosphere murky, at best.

[ThirstyDrunk]

Dear Savage,
Could god microwave a frozen burrito SO hot even HE couldn't eat it?

[Mr Boozificator]

Dear Savage,
Could god microwave a frozen burrito SO hot even HE couldn't eat it?

Dear Savage, my ESIC (Evil Scientist in Chief) has gone all religious on me and shit while I just want to eat, can I drop by your place for lunch?
I promise not to even try to look at your daughters or your bourbon, I am starving.
A mysterious evil Frenchy.

[Wingman]

I promise not to even try to look at your daughters or your bourbon.

you shouldn't make promises you don't want to keep.

[Mr Boozificator]

I promise not to even try to look at your daughters or your bourbon.

you shouldn't make promises you don't want to keep.

Hey, evil, remember?

[Savage]

Chicken salad on Miner's Sourdough with Pomosas. Grumpy grown jalapenos and tomatoes for the salsa. And do not forget, that my girls sprang from my loins, and one of them is a USMC veteran, and the other makes my cranky look like a how-de-doo.

[Cliffie S. Bockerson]

I promise not to even try to look at your daughters or your bourbon.

you shouldn't make promises you don't want to keep.

Hey, evil, remember?

If you stand n the right place, you can leer at her daughters *through* her bourbon. It will only distort them a little. That how-de-doo will just look how some chicks get cute when you feel condescension toward their anger.

[greygoose1]

Savage, dear Savaaaggge,

I'm dealin' with feelins of inadequacy because my a strange mounted fish (on a stand, no less) is wearing my Mickey's Malt Likka hat. I do want to confront that fish, but it's like he's always got his eye on me (hence the term, 'fish-eye'). Shallst I take this fish out, while using whatever weapons I deem necessary, or try for a peace treaty? Me wont me hat bak!

[Savage]

Savage, dear Savaaaggge,

I'm dealin' with feelins of inadequacy because my a strange mounted fish (on a stand, no less) is wearing my Mickey's Malt Likka hat. I do want to confront that fish, but it's like he's always got his eye on me (hence the term, 'fish-eye'). Shallst I take this fish out, while using whatever weapons I deem necessary, or try for a peace treaty? Me wont me hat bak!

After due consideration, I find that the only sensible reply to this post is WTF?

[Catroaster]

Quick technical question:

While I was at the supermarket, buying some scrumpy, I paid with a £20 note (it cost £8.90). The shop assistant gave me back another twenty and £1.10 in change. So, in effect the supermarket is paying me to drink their booze. Should I feel guilty?

[Bur]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9bZkp7q19f0

what do you make out of this Sav?

[Mr Boozificator]

Quick technical question:

While I was at the supermarket, buying some scrumpy, I paid with a £20 note (it cost £8.90). The shop assistant gave me back another twenty and £1.10 in change. So, in effect the supermarket is paying me to drink their booze. Should I feel guilty?

Yes, because whoever gave you the change back will be held responsible for what's missing when they do the counting at the end of the day. Being a gentleman costs nothing and it goes a long way. Being dishonest with people who work to make a living costs you your honor and takes you nowhere.

[Mr. Viking]

Quick technical question:

While I was at the supermarket, buying some scrumpy, I paid with a £20 note (it cost £8.90). The shop assistant gave me back another twenty and £1.10 in change. So, in effect the supermarket is paying me to drink their booze. Should I feel guilty?

Yes, because whoever gave you the change back will be held responsible for what's missing when they do the counting at the end of the day. Being a gentleman costs nothing and it goes a long way. Being dishonest with people who work to make a living costs you your honor and takes you nowhere.

unless you were both mistaken and it was a £30 note. Also, why did you only buy one? You could have bought 18

[Mother Goose]

Savage, dear Savaaaggge,

I'm dealin' with feelins of inadequacy because my a strange mounted fish (on a stand, no less) is wearing my Mickey's Malt Likka hat. I do want to confront that fish, but it's like he's always got his eye on me (hence the term, 'fish-eye'). Shallst I take this fish out, while using whatever weapons I deem necessary, or try for a peace treaty? Me wont me hat bak!

After due consideration, I find that the only sensible reply to this post is WTF?

Surprisingly, he's not as addled as he sounds, as this is what is currently on a bookshelf in our living room (much to my dismay):

[Savage]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9bZkp7q19f0

what do you make out of this Sav?

Korean? Fckd as hell? Oy dunno. It's my daughter studied with the intel.