Note: As absurd as some of them may seem,
we did not make any of these holidays up.
Key: Holiday. Pithy comment. Suggested holiday
libation. (Recipes included for the odd ones.)

November
1 Dia de los Muertos (Mexican). Raise a drink to lost friends. Dead Guy Ale.

2 Festival of Odin (Norse). Vikings believed they went on an eternal drinking binge with Odin if they died in combat. Glogg.

3 First dog goes to space (1957). Laika lasted two hours in orbit. Flying Dog Ale.

4 Cash register patented. Originally created to combat stealing by bartenders in a Dayton, Ohio saloon. One on the cuff.

5 Guy Fawkes’ Day (British). Celebrating the kook who tried to blow up the Houses of Parliament. Car Bomb.

6 St. Leonard’s Day. Patron saint of prisoners. Jailhouse Pruno.

7 Lono’s Day (Hawaiian). Party with Hunter S. Thompson’s favorite war god. Blue Hawaiian.

8 Abet & Aid Punsters Day Mania Festival (Roman). Like those bastards need our help. A drunk baseball player (a pitcher full of beer).

9 Feast of the Four Crowned Martyrs (Freemason). I sense a conspiracy. Crown Royal.

10 Stanley Found Livingstone, he presumed (1871). Seek out long lost bar buddies. Gin and tonic.

11 St. Martin’s Day. Patron saint of drunkards.
St. Martin Cocktail
1 1/2 oz gin
1 1/2 white rum
1 oz bitter lemon
Dash Angostura Bitters
Pour gin and rum over ice, top with bitter lemon, add angostura, stir.

12 Brotherhood of Fools founded (1381). Haven’t you put off your membership long enough? Old Milwaukee.

13 Stenia, the Bitching Festival (Wiccans). Let ‘em know exactly how you feel.
Bitch On Wheels
2 oz gin
1/2 oz dry vermouth
1/2 oz white creme de menthe
1 tsp Pernod
Stir with ice, strain.

14 Moccas’ Day (Celtic). Pig goddess festival. Blind Pig Ale.

15 National Clean Out Your Refrigerator Day. Make sure you load it with beer before you begin. As much beer as you can cram in your refrigerator.

16 W.C. Handy’s Birthday (1873). “I think a guy who’s had just the right amount of booze can sing the blues a hell of a lot better than a guy who is stone sober.”—Charlie Rich. Bourbon, neat.

17 Penance Day (Germany). Now, what would the Germans have to be penitent about?
War All the Time
2 1/2 oz vodka
1 oz Aftershock
3 oz tequila
2 oz beer
1 can frozen lemonade
Pour all into a blender. Blend until smooth.

18 Festival of the Nine Lotus Leaves (Chinese). Controlled by the Goddess of Mercy, Guan Yin. Nine shots of Maotai.

19 Warlock Day. According to ancient belief, the first stranger you meet on this day dressed entirely in black will be a warlock. Demon rum.

20 Revolution Day (Mexico). Drink until you have your own revolution(s). Tequila Slammer.

21 Feast of Hathor (Egyptian). The cow goddess Hathor wanted to destroy mankind, but Ra tricked her into drinking beer and passing out instead. Delicious, humanity-saving beer.

22 Anniversary of the Founding of the Friendly Sons of St. Vitus (1915). Pro-drinking not-so-secret society founded by journalists in a ship’s lounge. Cape Cod.

23 First jukebox installed (1889). Threatening the piano player no longer necessary. Boilermaker.

24 Henri de Toulouse-Lautrec’s Birthday (1864). Raise one to that lovable absinthe-swilling, whoremongering dwarf. Absinthe.

25 Women’s Merrymaking Day (Wiccan). Live it up, ladies! Girlie drinks.

26 Casablanca premiered (1942). Strasser: “What’s your nationality?” Rick: “I’m a drunkard.” Gin joint gin.

27 Bruce Lee’s Birthday (1940). Rent Enter the Dragon and take a drink every time Lee’s feet leave the ground. Forty of Midnight Dragon.

28 William Blake’s Birthday (1757). “The road of excess leads to the palace of wisdom.” One for the road.

29 Ice discovered on the Moon (1996). As soon as they discover scotch, I’m building my rocket ship. Red Rocket Ale.

30 Winston Churchill’s birthday (1874). “I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me.” Churchill Martini (pour the gin and glare across the room at a bottle of vermouth.)